A little bit of ancient history

Okay, not really. But I've spent the past few days going back and organizing my photos from my phone so that it would be easier for me to post here, and going back through old blog posts to see what all I've talked about, and I discovered so many things that I never told you or showed you! Holy goldfish, it's been a lot.

I mean, in 2015, I taught myself how to weave. I'm still pretty terrible at it, but I enjoy it when I can motivate myself to dress the loom. Weaving is like sewing, or like cooking or painting a room: they call it "painting", but 90% of your time is spent preparing to paint, not actually painting. With weaving, most of your time is spent putting the string onto the loom and making sure you don't have any tangles in it, and that the pattern is set into the loom (I'm trying to avoid technical talk here), before you can actually sit down and do any real weaving. But yeah. I learned weaving, and there are no pics or posts or even a tag on this blog for it. For shame!

In 2016, I participated in a project called "Calf to Codex". If you're a knitter, you may have heard the phrase "Sheep to Sweater" or "Sheep to Shawl". It's where someone starts with the raw wool, cards it, spins it into yarn, dyes it, then knits it, start to finish, every step of the process. Calf to Codex was like that. People took donated animal skins (actually mostly deer, but "deer to codex" doesn't have the same ring to it) and turned them into parchment; the organizer collected poems and songs pertinent to the SCA Middle Kingdom's history and origins (because of course this was an SCA project, no one else is quite that insane); we used ink made from a period recipe and goose quills for pens, hand-ground pigments and binders for paint, genuine gold leaf for the gilding and period binders to stick it to the page. Then the pages were gathered and stitched together using linen thread that was spun from flax grown by SCA gardeners; the silk thread used for the decorative stitching at top and bottom was gathered from an SCA silkworm expert who grew the caterpillars herself; the cover was made from hand-planed oak boards covered with leather that was no only hand-tooled, the guy who did it, built his own leather-working tools from wood and brass.

The idea was to show that we have the skill sets and craft know-how within the SCA to set up an industry like this, or at least to recreate it, from start to finish. Between flax growers, chicken farmers (two of the paint binders were egg yolk and egg white which came from period breeds of chickens, because, again, we're insane that way), the silkworm lady, parchment makers, various poets and minstrels, calligraphers, illuminators, the bookbinding team, and the leather-worker, we totaled about 75 people on a project that took five years to complete. It's beautiful, though. A little smelly, because the parchment makers were still perfecting their craft--but the end result should last a few hundred years and is an excellent example of just what we're capable of when we put our minds to it.

My daughter assisted me with some of the illumination. I did calligraphy and illumination, and also took a course on medieval music notation, to write the first song of the book out as music rather than only lyrics. I also got to write a translation of a period book curse: basically, "Don't steal this book OR ELSE".

So that was 2016.

In 2017, I made scrolls, including several to meet our then-king's demand (request) to help get us caught up on a number of overdue awards that had been missed due to a glitch in our award recommendation database. I also got to see one of my close friends from years ago elevated to the highest honor we have for arts, the Order of the Laurel, and got to make her scroll for her. There are, of course, many pictures.

Throughout the past two or three years, I've been doing henna, but recently joined an online "club" for henna artists and discovered that, wow, my skills are not what I thought they were. My confidence in that area is a little shaky, but then, as one of the phenomenal artists said to me, it's not a race. We're not competing with one another. We're all making henna and adding beauty to the world. If I worked 40 hours a week on henna the way a lot of these ladies do, I'd definitely be more skilled than I am presently. As it is, I get about eight hours of practice in, once a month, for five months out of the year. And people still like my work! So instead of being ashamed, I should maybe consider just practicing and using up old henna.

But yeah. I've been busy, I just haven't had much motivation to show it here. There's a blogging app on my phone that works okay, but not great, and getting all those photos organized was definitely an obstacle to posting anything here. However, I hope to post a little at a time over the next few weeks and get caught up to present day, and maybe motivate myself to get something else started again; I'm looking at getting back to my mosaics here in the winter months, or starting a new weaving project. We'll see what happens.

Let me know what you're interested in seeing, and I'll try to post that first!

Where have I been?

Oh dear.

I've been busy, or tired, or just generally neglectful. But I have at least been making art and writing stories, and once the holidays are over perhaps I will get back into the habit of posting here regularly. That's a good New Year's resolution to make, isn't it?

Some highlights:

• A Laurel scroll (very high award in the SCA) for an old friend of mine, well deserved and long overdue.
• Taking up a challenge and producing eight or nine other scrolls as part of a massive effort to get overdue awards to people. If I remember right, nearly 200 people produced something like 600 scrolls in 20 weeks.
• Writing even more fan fiction, including the completion of my first series, which includes two novels and three novellas, as well as a collection of deleted scenes.
• Plenty of henna at various street festivals in town.
• Plenty of singing for the Lafayette Chamber Singers.

But yes, I'm feeling a bit tired and it's been hard to motivate to blog about all the stuff I've been up to. Sorry for leaving my readers hanging (all two of you). Facebook and Tumblr are probably to blame as well, heh.

In other news, I'm setting up a Ko-fi page, sort of like a tip jar for online creators. If you like what I've done for you, and if you're the sort of person who might buy me a coffee if we were in person, consider dropping by my Ko-fi page instead.

Hope you have a great holiday season no matter what you celebrate (or if you celebrate), and I'll do my best to get you some pretty pictures soon.

Cheers!

Words on Wednesday

Hello all,

I've been trying to get into a habit of posting more consistently here at Little Fiddly Bits, whether I'm posting as an editor or just in general. In my head I've been calling it "Words on Wednesday", which is admittedly a little cheesy, but then I try to convince myself to clean the house with "Mundane Monday", so, there ya go.

Not much on the editing front today, except that the world seems out to get me with the constant misuse of the words "rein" and "reign". The second one means rule of a kingdom. Think "regnum" which is Latin for kingdom. The first one is what you use to steer a horse. You do not give someone "free reign". You do not "reign someone in" when they get too crazy. You do, however, "reign supreme." Can we all please just embrace this and stop putting all over everything I read? I'd be really grateful.

I have two henna gigs this weekend, which is unprecedented given that it's only he beginning of March. Henna doesn't usually start up for me until May at the earliest. So. Yay! Now I just need to mix up a fresh batch of paste, rather than using last year's. There is generally nothing wrong with using last year's henna, but this time around my final batch didn't turn out right and didn't do much for clients anywhere other than their hands. Which was disappointing, given that I'd mixed it up for a cancer patient to do on her scalp, and we ended up with hardly any color. So I'm going to give that stuff away for free to people who are curious about trying henna, warn them that it's not very dark, and let them have fun.

I freaked my daughter out yesterday, accidentally. She'd been cheerfully humming "The Hall of the Mountain King" while she puttered, just quietly going "bum-bum-bum-bum Bum bum Bum, Bum bum Bum, Bum bum Bum" and I recognized it and brought it up on Youtube for her to listen to... yeah. She didn't know that it turned into the orchestral equivalent of a heavy-metal mosh pit halfway in, and she gets emotionally affected by music the same way I do, so it was like forcing her to watch a horror movie. I felt terrible.

Then I told her the story of a friend of mine who, back in high school, was in the marching band , at a football game, and his team wasn't doing well, and he was bored, so he fired up the tuba and just quietly started going "bum-bum-bum-bum Bum bum Bum" etc... See, "Hall of the Mountain King" sounds amazing on tuba. And the rest of the marching band was also bored. And they got into it. And they got louder. And their football team heard them and also got into it, and started hitting harder. And the game kinda turned around from that point. Once my daughter was laughing, we turned the music back on again and she listened to it a second time and decided that it was pretty awesome, as long as she could pretend to be a dwarf with a hammer and chisel and go pound things. Which, let's face it, is pretty much what that piece of music is for.

That's pretty much it for my words on Wednesday. Got a deadline to meet for someone presenting a PhD thesis, first time working on one of those. Novel length, only nonfiction and with bigger words. And I'm writing fanfic again, I've got a chapter I need to clean up and post. If you're curious, I'll only tell you that I like Loki far too much to be healthy.

Have a great week!

My Current Hope-To List

Longtime readers will recognize that I've made some cosmetic changes to the blog in the past few days (let me know what you think of those, btw); well, I was doing some stuff behind the scenes and had cause to look at a bunch of posts from about 2008 or so.

It was kinda cool, but also kinda depressing.

Cool to see some of the projects and ideas I'd had floating around – but depressing to see how many of those are still in stasis, and more so to see that the things that were bugging me about life in 2008 are still bugging me today, in 2011.  I still need a job.  I still am having relationship issues.  I still question my abilities as a mother, and my value to society.

Like I said: depressing.  It's as if I'm the project that is currently in some kind of indefinite holding pattern.

However, that's not what I want this post to be about.  I want it to be about all the nifty ideas that I've had floating around, waiting to be acted on, and on all the sweet projects that actually have come to fruition in the past few years.

So, here is my current "hope-to" list.  It's not a to-do list because those are depressing and frustrating; it's a list of stuff I hope to get to because it would be nifty if I could.

• Hang-gliding; and once upon a time, you could actually take that for PE credit at Indiana University in Bloomington.
• Marionettes, which have interested me ever since I read Pinocchio when I was about six, and the book had this terrific appendix about them, their history, and how to craft papier-mache heads and the proper way to rig the controls.
• Mosaics.  I have #3 to repair and then 9 more to build to finish that monster of a project
• Oil lamps and
• Silk banners – both of these are for our group campsite at Pennsic, but I've taken a class on oil lamps and they're really really cool.  Cost-effective, safer than tiki and lighter-fluid type things, pretty, and crazy easy to make. The banners would involve learning silk-painting, which I could totally see becoming my Next Crazy Project for a few years, you know?
• Hand-crafted books.  I already know how to do a specific type of limp-binding, and I've even built one full of calligraphy already as part of a group project to make a "scroll" (see previous posts about the accuracy of that name) back in 2003.  I keep thinking of crafting a pair of books with favorite poems in them, to gift to a couple friends of ours.  Making the book itself only takes about 90 minutes, if you have all the right supplies.  Prepping the pages, doing the text and illustrations and such, takes considerably longer.
• Decent, regular work in henna bookings.  I could pay my bills with this if I had more consistent business, but that's a big if.  I really enjoy puttin' the pretty on people, though.  Also, that's not really a "project" like the other things on this list.

See, that's my problem with lists:  I start out with "want-to" and start putting in "should" and "need to".  For instance, right now I need to get a job and should start looking.  The house needs de-cluttering, organizing and cleaning.  I should be downstairs getting a load of dishes going.  Blah, blah, bleah, blah.

Anyway.  Watch this space; I hope to get more calligraphy stuff up this evening – but I do have a gig tomorrow that I still need to finish preparing for.

If any of you have ideas for how I could turn this stuff into a regular job, I'm all ears!

Music! Henna! Links!

So, as part of my involvement in the SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism), I have finally gotten back to singing in our local chapter's choir, the Rivenstar Madrigali.  Recently one of our members recorded one of our rehearsals.  As my friend and fellow soprano Katya said, "Not bad for a take-all-comers casual choir," and I agree.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GhXwGMH6giU

If you want to play Spot The Blogger, I'm the only one there who didn't have this piece memorized, as the others had been rehearsing it for months and I only rejoined in January.

As a self-professed choir snob, it's been hard for me sometimes to just let go of the expectations about what I think we "should" be doing (based on years in college-level choirs with conductor/instructors who demanded a very, very high level of focus, discipline, attention to detail, skill, and all the rest that goes with taking choir for a grade), and allow myself to enjoy all the things that we are doing.  We're singing, and we're enjoying the sound, and you know what?  That's something to be grateful for all by itself.

**

Next Wednesday kicks off my fourth season with the Sagamore West Farmer's Market!  Today I finally got my contract and booth fee delivered to the right people!  They were already full!  They were only merciful about letting me in because I'd achieved "permanent" status!  I'm using up my lifetime quota of exclamation points with this paragraph!  Woo-hoo!

**

Next Wednesday, a couple hours before the market kicks off, I'll be at Sunspot Market giving a talk as part of Sunspot's "Food For Thought" program.  Basically they serve lunch and invite a speaker to come be all educational and stuff, and I get to talk a little about the history and culture of henna, then give people free samples before dashing up the street to set up my booth.  They have a little flier that they put up for each month's speakers, and when I stopped in to buy supplies today, I saw that they were gracious enough to give me a really nice blurb.  Felt nice to see, you know?

If you're local, I'd love to see you there, and if you can't make it, well, the market really is only a few blocks away.

Cheers!

PS - Ladysmith Black Mambazo. That is all.

Couple brief announcements

Okay, first, the farmer's market season starts next week if you can believe it.  I almost can't, which is probably why I still haven't actually gotten my signed contract and booth fee in to the right people so that I have official permission to show up.  Yes, I plan to fix that tomorrow.

**

Before that, though, there is a bellydance seminar called Mirage Caravan, with workshops and performances taking place this weekend, to benefit the Ehlers-Danlos National Foundation.  Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome is a very weird and rare thing that affects the collagen in a person's body.  Sometimes this means that their skin can't hold together and tears easily. Sometimes it means that organs won't hold together, and a sudden sneeze or laugh can actually break things inside and kill the person.  And sometimes it means that the person's cartilage is extremely loose, such that they can go to sleep and wake up in the morning with dislocated ribs.  That last version is the kind that the event's organizer lives with, and she tells me that it's the least serious of the three, but still quite painful and inconvenient on the better days.  I didn't know that a person actually could dislocate their sternum, but apparently if your cartilage is loose enough, you can.

I will be slingin' the henna at a social a couple days before the event, so local performers can get all prettied up in time to allow the designs to darken to their peak color on Friday or Saturday.  I'll also be vending on Saturday, and slingin' again at an after-party to be held Sunday.

I have high hopes for my credit card bill this month.  And yes, there's a whole soapbox there about how I don't like having to think in such a mercenary fashion about something I enjoy, but there it is.  It's a debate that has raged among artists especially, that I have seen at least, for some time - how ought one feel about charging money for something that is inherently rewarding just to do?  But that's not an announcement and I am genuinely trying to stick to the damn topic for once (heh), so let's save it for later.

**

Finally, I know I keep promising to post pictures of the calligraphy project that I did recently.  I spent today scanning some of the background and prep-work pages - sketches, text mockups, things like that - so that I could include them when I go to describe the process.  Unfortunately, by the time I finished everything it was (is) nearly 11pm and I'm tired.  Trust me, if you don't do a blog of your own, or write elsewhere, putting all this together takes time.  I've put a couple hours into posts before now when they were especially image-heavy, and I assure you, this one will be one of those.

Tomorrow.  Really.  I mean it.  After I turn my contract in to the farmer's market people at City Hall.

**

Finally, I still need a job, and I still hate the job search process.  I'm just tossing the thought onto the waves of the Internet Ocean and letting it drift where it will.  And no, that isn't the ONLY thing I'm doing to find work.  Sheesh.

Later!

Showing off some henna

Hello all,

I'm excited to have a booking this coming weekend at a bridal shower, so partly in honor of that, partly as advertisement of my capabilities for any of the guests who might visit, and partly because I feel like showing off, here are some images from the past couple of months.

When I get bookings, I like to really dress myself up with the henna beforehand – again, partly just in the spirit of things, and partly to show my clients what they can expect to see on their own skin.  There's no better way to explain what henna does than to show it!  So, back in August, I went completely nuts on my palm in preparation for a booking with the Phi Mu sorority on campus.

I apologize for the quality of the photos here, but I hadn't yet rediscovered where my real camera had been hiding for the past year or more.  And when I was a kid, phones weren't even portable, much less capable of taking pictures, so quitcher whining.

For the record, I took my sweet time with this design, finishing the index finger over a couple of hours on a Monday night, and the palm over a couple more hours on a Tuesday evening.  Most of my photos show the henna paste still on the skin; that paste is staining your skin with the natural dye contained in henna leaves.  This is what henna actually looks like after after you've let it sit for several hours to absorb as much as you can, rinsed the paste off, and given the design a day or so to darken.

If you look very closely up near the large leaf shape (at the base of the fingers) you can see some "ghost" images of henna.  I slept with the henna paste on, but didn't do the best job of wrapping and protecting it, so when I closed my hand I got a few mirror-images of lines along the major creases there.

This detail of the index finger shows the mirror images very clearly, from the leaf up onto the middle and ring fingers.  Lesson: wrap your henna to protect it and to protect all the places you don't want it to go.

Over the next few days, I'll give you a forearm design I did for the heck of it at a birthday party – not a booking, just an excuse to give some free work to one of our favorite babysitters – and a pair of hands from the farmer's market a few weeks ago. 

Speaking of the market: Weather, illness, more weather, and a kid's double ear infection have kept me away from the market lately, but I really hope to be able to make it there on the 20th. The season ends for good on the 27th, and then I'll have to rely on bookings or else quietly go stir-crazy until next spring.

Cheers, all!

Found: My camera, plus I'm a psychic now

The thing's been missing since January, and we hadn't uploaded the pictures from it since sometime in 2008.  Yeah.  It's kind of a miracle this blog gets updated at all.

However, I've got a recent photo for you that I'm really proud of, for a couple of reasons.  First, the kind lady whose hand I'm about to show you told me that she got her most recent henna (prior to visiting me) at Indiana Beach, where she paid almost double what I charged her, and was... underwhelmed by the result.  The henna never really darkened, and she wasn't too thrilled with the artist's skill either.  Not to brag too excessively, but she was a lot happier with mine.

Second, this design was a complete and total "wing-it" from the first line; neither of us was sure what we would end up with, so I was as surprised and happy as she was with how it turned out.  Yes, I know that sounds like a line of bull - how could I not know what I was drawing, right?

Well, you see.  There's this thing.

After I've been slinging the henna for awhile, I kind of tap into a deeper intuition than I usually work with - it's almost like someone is standing over my shoulder going, "no, no, you're gonna draw this".  Other times I feel less like I'm inventing a design and more like I'm tracing something that's already there; I really can nearly see the basic shape, or at least a starting outline, when I look at the client's hand or leg or whatever.  I hesitate to call it "psychic" because that just sounds way too full of myself, but I'm kind of sleepy right now and I can't come up with a better word for it right at the moment. 

How do I explain it... okay, you know what it feels like to get an idea, right?  You're asking yourself what to have for dinner or how to write that story or do that other crafty thing, and your mind says, "oh, I know, how about..." and you've got an idea.  Right?

Okay. Now, if it's never happened to you, try to imagine that you first say, "oh, I know," and you get your idea, and then you immediately follow that with, "wait, what? That? Really?"  The biggest thing for me is that sometimes the thing doesn't really feel like it's completely your idea; there's some aspect of it that feels like someone else just gave you their idea and made you say, "huh?"  It's not what you'd normally come up with.  It isn't completely you, if that makes any sense.

Anyway.

The lady was feeling a little skeptical after her most recent henna experience, and I think maybe she wanted to test me a little bit.  Certainly she was curious to see what I could do for her.

Her boyfriend's design made even less sense to me, but he loved it, so that makes it a success.

That's the hardest part - not having the idea, but trusting it and being willing to run with whatever comes into my head, even - especially - if it doesn't make sense at first glance.

So, how many of you have had similar experiences?  Do you run with them?  What kind of results do you get?  I want to hear about it.

Till next time,
cheers!

Heather

Henna and other things

If you like, I could enter the obligatory, "gosh, it's been such a long time, I'm really sorry, insert reason here" paragraph, but honestly – it's been life.  Getting temp assignments (aka work with a real paycheck attached!), getting a kid who's sick and crazy or healthy and loopy, procrastinating, following some other obsession (Hello, Eminem, shall I call you Mr. Nem?), and sometimes just plain guilt that I haven't posted in so long, have all taken their turns at various points to keep me away from the blog.

Meh.

I try to keep this blog focused on the creative side of my life and not all the other boring, mundane, and/or angst-depression-emo-girl stuff.  So.  Life has kept me from doing anything other than post to Twitter for some time, and if you want details, you can follow that.

***

I'd like to take a moment to thank the Phi Mu sorority at Purdue for a lovely time this past Tuesday evening.  Get the rude jokes and sorority-girl references out of your system if you must; they were hosting a welcome-back party for the sisters and invited me to sling the henna.

Five hours and nearly forty women later… (oh, all right, even I admit there's no way to avoid the innuendo in that one) –

Anyway, I was able to draw lots of Greek letters, pretty viney things, and cover more ankles than I have in a long time.  My default at the farmer's market tends to be designs on hands.  This time around there were a lot of requests for designs up along the base of the neck, and quite a few on the inside of the wrist.  I grant that the wrist is a nice feminine spot to put something, but I have no idea whether the ladies got any color to their designs.  They've promised me pictures, though, so here's hoping.

***

The August Mosey has come and gone, and some of my customers were gracious enough to pass along photos that they took while I was working.  So here they are, with thanks to Cynthia:

My next appearances will be this week's farmer's market (as always, assuming the weather cooperates), and the Morton Center Global Fest this Saturday the 4th.  At the moment, it looks like the September Mosey has chosen to shift weekends – it would ordinarily fall on the 11th – so that it conflicts with Global Fest, again, but if that changes then I will be able to attend both events.  Otherwise, I'll be slinging ten hours' worth of henna at the climate-controlled Morton Center, rather than five hours' worth outdoors at the Mosey.

***

Probably I should unbury the scanner long enough to take a picture of the embroidery.  I've been putting off working on that for awhile now, also, but it's looking so, so cool.  Let's look for that in my next post, mmkay?  For now, I've got life to get back to in the form of laundry and dishes.

(See, aren't you glad I leave that stuff off my list of things-worth writing-about?)

Henna photos!

I'm finally taking the time to dig through my email backlog, and post some photos that you all have been gracious enough to send to me.  Here are some from a birthday party booking back in March (I know, I know).

This client loved elephants and thought it was pretty cool that I could draw a reasonable looking one upside down.  Next time I'll try to avoid the Mickey Mouse ears.

If you've never gotten henna before, the thicker skin on your palms can absorb much more color than the backs of your hands can.  It looks good on the back of your hand – you've seen photos here that prove that – but it looks phenomenal on your palms.

This was a fun, active party, and most of the ladies wanted to socialize rather than sit for complex henna designs.  This was not a problem as far as I was concerned!

Special thanks to the party's designated camera girl, Mega Rae, for sending these to me.  Naturally, special thanks also go to Rachael for booking me and for the party's hosts for having me – even though I showed up as scheduled, I was first to the party by a good half-hour, and they were very gracious about having a total stranger in their home.

Memorials, monsoons, and Eminem

If there are any of you who came out to last Saturday's Mosey Down Main Street, and are maybe wondering if you walked past my booth without noticing it, never fear.  You'll be pleased to know that I was there for about an hour, during which time the temperature dropped from 87 degrees (heat index: 102) to 73, as the winds picked up, the rain started, and downtown proceeded to get absolutely drenched by a truly impressive thunderstorm.

Winds were reported gusting up to 70 mph, although I'm pretty sure I missed the worst of those; Beloved Husband and I were able to get everything taken down and thrown into the back of the van before the lightning front moved in.  We went to eat and I tried not to yelp too much as my hair dripped cold rain down the back of my neck.

Maybe I'm just a pansy, but there's something about being at an outdoor fair with tornado sirens going off that just – I dunno, just doesn't appeal to me.

***

On Sunday I was told I should consider a career in politics (blargh), because the world needed more honest, straight-talking people to hold office.  This was shortly after, and a direct result of, my standing at a podium and calling an entire roomful of people "lucky bastards".

At a funeral.

Earlier last week we got the news that Dan Lawrence had passed away suddenly.  Dan was an acquaintance of mine, and old friend of The Husband, so we would have attended the memorial anyway; Husband actually ended up being asked to officiate the service.

I don't know if you can ever describe a funeral as "good", but if you could then this service would have been a prime example: the building was packed with people whose lives Dan had touched over the years, a great many of whom opted to speak, impromptu, from the heart about the man they were going to miss.  There were tears, there was laughter, there were a great many references to programming, Rocky Horror, Dr. Who, and various sci-fi and gaming jokes.  This is what happens when nerds die; if you are a nerd, take comfort, and if not, well, you've been warned.)

Dan was described as someone who would do anything for a friend, no questions asked; he was regarded as a brother, mentor, uncle, and good-natured corrupter of college freshmen by probably hundreds of people for nearly three decades.   So the people who had the privilege of knowing Dan so well really are lucky bastards.

It made me wonder what kind of funeral service I'd leave behind when I'm gone, and ask myself when the last time was that I had, as I said at the service, "gotten my head out of my baggage and given so generously".  What would people say about me if I dropped dead tonight?  I'm afraid I'm not too excited about the possibilities just now.

My brain goes strange places sometimes, and it usually comes back with an opinion and the need to share it.  Let's face it, I'm a teacher and storyteller down to the bone, with a little performer thrown in. (Or maybe I'm just self-centered enough to think my opinion is worth sharing with the world, or maybe I'm so desperate for attention that I'm willing to inflict myself on a captive audience.  The jury's still out, depending on who you are and what you think of me in general.)

What I needed to share Sunday was that grief is not about our fear for the deceased's soul.  It is not about our belief that they no longer exist unless they've been "saved" by the religion of your choice. (Well, okay, I also needed to share my irritation at funeral services where the pastor uses the person's death as the basis for a sales pitch for their religion. Feh.)  Grief is about that person inside us that never outgrows the age of about five, the one that yells, "hey, no fair! I wasn't ready! You can't do that!"  I needed to tell an entire roomful of genius-level IQs, people who probably already knew this, that they don't need to feel selfish – and the definitely don't need to feel alone in their grief.

If there's a rule somewhere that says memorial services are required to include a sales pitch, I told the assembled crowd, then let it not be that you-yes-you-can-get-to-heaven-if-you-act-now-and-get-saved. Let it be that you, yes you, can be the kind of person Dan was, and that it isn't even that hard.

All you have to do is give.

***

It's possible that I told the room they were a bunch of lucky bastards because I've been listening to too much Eminem lately.  I mean if you're going to be thoroughly crass while also demonstrating tremendous emotional honesty, I guess he'd be a decent model to pattern yourself after, right?

I was online looking for footage of P!nk's performance of "Glitter In The Air" at this year's Grammy Awards; when I found it, it was immediately followed by a video for the single "Not Afraid", from Eminem's newest album, the yet-to-be-released Recovery.  Which, by the way, is pretty amazing; see above re: emotional honesty, presented in genius lyrics disguised by, well, by the kind of pottymouth I don't usually encounter in my comfy little world.

Well, because I do this, watching one cool video got me curious and I started looking for more of his stuff.  And more.  And more.  (If you recall my recent obsession with Robert Downey, Jr., this behavior might be starting to look familiar. Shush anyway.)

I learned that Eminem and I have exactly four things in common: we're white, we're left-handed, we were born in the same year, and we're raising girls (though I only have the one).  Trust me, we could not possibly be more different in every other aspect of our backgrounds.

But.

I also learned that he's had some collaborations that I wouldn't have thought of as likely – Dido, for one – and, for better or worse, this information sent my brain to its special place again.  This time I came back with the need to come up with the absolute least likely rap collaboration possible on this earth.

Because that is just the way I roll, yo.

The only rule is that this collaboration has to include Eminem.  I'd prefer that it be "Eminem feat. [Insert Artist Here]" because,  while  there are definitely some brain-achingly weird possibilities if you do it the other way around (for instance, "Willie Nelson featuring Eminem"), I think that makes it almost too easy.

Currently I'm not sure which would be more mind-boggling: a collaboration between Eminem and Loreena McKennitt, or an appearance on Sesame Street where he takes on Elmo in a freestyle battle.

I'm not sure how much responsibility I can really claim for the things my mind comes up with, when I'm usually as bewildered and entertained as the rest of you.

We won't discuss the rap I started putting together for no reason whatsoever while I was in the shower this afternoon, although I swear, for once I really wasn't operating in the Land of the Weird.  No, really, I swear – there was stuff in there about Martin Luther King and rising above, and a bunch of other things I'm trying not to remember for fear that I'll embarrass myself even more than I already have just by bringing it up.

We also won't discuss why I would get embarrassed over trying to create rap lyrics, but not over calling mourning friends and family members bastards at the memorial service.

How do you spell "gangsta", my homie?

Just a quickie

For now, I'll just tell you that the weather is lookin' fine and I will be at the Farmer's Market later today. Last week was a record-breaker for me in terms of customers, and I'm hoping that this week will continue the trend.


There's a lot of other stuff I could write about, but it's going to take awhile to rant about losing my (apparently seasonal) job after only a month, publish an anti-resume, and so forth.

Sigh.

***

Speaking of getting lots of customers to draw on, this month's Mosey Down Main Street will be this Saturday, and weather permitting I will be there and waiting for you.  Yes, you.

Little of this, little of that…

The following is likely to be a little disjointed, because I'm very tired and have a lot of random… stuff… going on in my head.  You've been warned.

***

First and foremost, though, I need to let folks know that I will not be at the Farmer's Market this Wednesday.  The Daughter has been taking a kiddie-level gymnastics and ballet class, and they're giving a "performance" for all the parents.  Husband offered to take video for me, but this is not something I intend to watch second-hand if I can help it.

I'm not that great a fan of gymnastics; I am, however, a huge fan of my kid.

Be seeing you next week, weather willing.

***

I realize most of the Internet-surfing world likes to download their music, anymore, but since I'm now actually old enough to be able to talk about The Younger Generation, I've decided I have the right to be crotchety and old-fashioned at will (although I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around the idea that owning a compact disc is old-fashioned, seeing as I was around when they were invented).  I like owning CDs.  I like having a cabinet full of them.  It's anybody's guess which of us brought the larger music collection into the marriage, me or The Husband – it's hard to tell since we both brought a number of cassette tapes with us – but I daresay my personal stash is bigger now, after working for five years for an arts presenter and getting lots of free autographed CDs as thank-you gifts from well-fed musicians.

I mention this because I'm listening to Pandora Radio as I write (see, I can be hip and with-it too) and making a mental list of CDs I need to own soon.  And I don't care that I'm probably way, way outside Lady Gaga's target demographic.  I was around when Madonna was invented, after all.

Also, Hans Zimmer is a living god.  If you've never heard of him, that's okay, because you've probably heard of the movies Gladiator and Sherlock Holmes, and he composed (and performed on) the soundtracks for those among many others.

Have I mentioned my birthday is coming up in less than a week?

***

I know I've said before that being around pretty colors, if those colors are for sale in any shape or form, usually means I need a chaperone and someone else to hang onto my wallet.

Have I mentioned that I work at a greenhouse?  And at the moment, practically everything is in bloom?

I've had to make myself promise not to buy anything more until I've finished planting what I've already got… but at least I get a wicked employee discount.

***

I've got an odd schedule this week, with three days off in a row.  I've been hoping to get a little space like this where I could get some things done around the house, so guess what I did today?

Pretty much not a damn thing.

This never feels good, and I do it anyway, and I hate it when I do it, and that won't stop me from doing it again.  I mean, I hit the hardware store and bought some stuff I needed, but that's pretty much it. No laundry folded (my kid deserves a room she can actually play in and not to have to hunt for clean clothes), no dishes put away, none washed, no recycling run to the center, nothing planted… oh, although Daughter and I did water them this morning and she and I both enjoyed that.

***

Pause to try and cuddle Daughter as part of her bedtime routine – enter argument about whether or not she gets to have any kind of snack after she's brushed her teeth.  I. Freaking. Hate. This.  I'm tired, I slept for crap, haven't had much appetite today, am unhappy that I got nothing done, and now I've got a whiny argumentative overtired monkey trying to rearrange reality: "No those aren't the rules, Mommy, the rules are pretzels, I waaaaaaannnt pretzelllllllllllls…"

I'm a better mommy when I've had rest and am not irritated with myself.

***

I'm a lot less depressing to read when I've gotten some food into me, I promise.  But once I've finished eating I intend to crash, and hopefully get some real sleep tonight.  Last night, heat and the need for a midnight snack had the kiddo awake, and therefore had me awake, three separate times, none of which were the usual wake-up time around this house.  At least it was light out for the last one, but I wanted to still be in bed, not dragging on a pair of shorts and trying to work my head around deep concepts such as Feeding The Child Is Important, or No Going To Preschool Naked.

Sneaking into henna season

*sigh*

The farmer's market kicked off this past Wednesday.  The mayor was there, news crews were there, and I was there.

However, my sign was not there, friendly and non-threatening skies were not there… and customers were not there.  Not for me, anyway.

I've recently been hired at a nearby greenhouse to help with the spring rush (and hopefully beyond that), and I will be putting my first or second paycheck into getting a decent sign for the booth.  I'm thinking of going really over the top and getting something visible from more than three feet away.  Maybe even something that I didn't make myself on a disposable plastic tablecloth with Sharpie markers.

I know, I know, I'm out of control.  Wooo.

(Don't knock the Sharpies-on-tablecloth thing, though; that was my sign for the past two years and it did its job well.)

***

This past Saturday was the first Mosey Down Main Street, which I really wanted to attend, but all that day it looked like it was going to turn out to be the Shiver-In-The-Howling-Wind Down Main Street instead.  So I stayed home, switched the house's furnace back on, and tried not to regret my decision too much.

Next time, Mosey… next time.  We will meet again.

***

In other news, I'm working at a greenhouse!  I have a steady paycheck!  I'm surrounded by green and growing things and so far I haven't had to water any of them!

I'm still new enough that I haven't gotten all the shiny rubbed off of me yet, but I have figured out pretty quickly that it's nearly impossible to be grumpy when you can look out across a sea of blooming plants in every color of the rainbow.  Even the customers aren't grumpy, or at least they get noticeably less grumpy as soon as they cross over from the store/checkout area into the greenhouse proper.

Yay, plants!

***

Hope your Mother's Day was a good one, whether you are a mother yourself or just descended from one.  We collected the kid from her grandparents' house where she had spent the weekend, ate seafood prepared in a variety of unhealthy-yet-tasty ways, and drove home.  While she was gone, I got to watch not one, but two movies (in an actual theater and everything), which is more than I've seen in the past six months, easily.  The last time I saw a movie at all was in December when Sherlock Holmes came out, so you'll forgive me if I seem a little over-excited about actually getting to another film without having to wait to get the DVD as a gift from the in-laws.

All I can say is, Iron Man 2 is good, and How to Train Your Dragon is breathtaking, great, amazing, and I want to go watch it again right now.

***

There's other stuff, but I'm a little tired – seeing great movies keeps me awake because my imagination keeps either reliving or adding to the story – and I have to work tomorrow, and so on and yadda and all that.  The only thing I have left to say is that my outgoing email continues to not work, and we can't figure out why.  Inbound email operates just fine, but I can't send anything – so if you're trying to reach me for a henna booking, or any other reason, I'd appreciate it if you included a phone number and a time I might be able to reach you.

Cheers, and talk to you soon.

Brochure #2: Booking information

So, you'd like to have some henna done, and the Farmer's Market isn't convenient.  Go ahead and drop me an email or give me a call*, and I'll ask you the following questions.

• Where will we get together?
  • I do not have a storefront apart from my seasonal booth at the Sagamore West Farmer's Market.  I will be happy to come to your home, or to meet somewhere neutral such as a coffeehouse, restaurant, or other party location.
  • In the event that the booking takes place outside Tippecanoe County, I reserve the right to charge for gas/mileage expenses.
• When do you need me?
  • I am available every weekday except Wednesdays, usually on fairly short notice, although I prefer at least three days' advance notice for my bookings.  For Saturdays and Sundays, you will need to call me at least 7 days in advance so that I can arrange my schedule accordingly.
• How long will you need me?
  • This is an important consideration when you are planning your booking.  Each henna design takes a certain length of time to apply; naturally, the actual length of time depends on the design's size and complexity.  If you want me to cover two dozen guests in an hour, be prepared for small, cute and simple.
  • Another factor which is often overlooked is what I call the "pace" of the party.  At an especially laid-back event, it can take fifteen minutes or longer for a guest to wander over to my chair and get their design.  If you don't mind having the party run long, that's not a problem; however, if you'd like to be able to kick your guests out at a reasonable hour in the evening, we'll need to work together to keep my client chair occupied!
• How many people will be there?
  • If you only plan to have yourself and maybe one other person with you, you are a "private appointment", with no minimum fee.  Four or more clients count as a "party", with a minimum fee of $30 for the event.
    • The minimum fee is a "safety net" for me, which I have yet to use.  It works like this: Let's say you plan to have 12 guests at your party, but then only a few people actually show up.  If for some reason I can't earn at least $30 from those guests, then you (the host) would be responsible for covering the difference.
• How would you like to pay? (For parties of four or more)
  • Informal In an "informal" setting like a moms' group or ladies' night, the host arranges for me to be there, and each client pays for their own henna design. As long I am able to earn my $30 minimum, the host will not need to pay for anything extra, other than whatever henna you want for yourself.
  • Formal In a "formal" setting, such as a bridal shower or birthday party, the host and I agree in advance on a set amount of henna per person, which the host will pay for. (Example: a bridal shower where the hostess arranged to cover $10 per guest.) If a guest wants henna beyond the pre-set cost, they can cover the difference themselves.  This way the host will not have any unexpected costs, and guests wanting extra henna for themselves won't have to pay the full price.
  • I accept either cash or checks; my business is not equipped to process credit cards.

*My contact information:

heather DOT bungardjanney AT gmail DOT com
765-463-6452

I hope to hear from you!

Cheers,
Heather

Brochure #1: Common questions

Here in the Midwest, not too many people are familiar with henna art.  Here are answers to the questions I hear the most when I'm running my booth.

• What is that?
  • This stuff is called henna, or sometimes mehndi or mehandi.  (Technically, henna is the stuff, and mehndi is what I'm doing with it.)
  • Henna is a "vegetable dye", a natural dye found in the leaves of the henna plant.  It stains the skin, just like blueberries make your tongue turn purple, or mustard stains your shirt.  It is not a chemical dye; I have never and will never use artificial ingredients in my henna mix.
  • Growers harvest henna leaves, dry and powder them, and sell the powder to people like me.  I mix the powder into a paste with other ingredients, then I draw designs on your skin with it.  The dye soaks in and stains your skin.
• Is that a real tattoo?
  • No. People call it a tattoo because it's artwork done on your skin, but that's the ONLY thing henna has in common with real tattoos.
  • Real tattoos use needles to inject colors into the inner layer of your skin, to make them permanent.  I'm drawing on the outer layer of your skin.  Some henna artists do use plain syringes, without needles, to draw very fine lines in their designs.
  • Laws vary from state to state, but in general, tattoos must be applied in a medically clean environment (antiseptic soap, alcohol wipes, medical gloves, all that) and only to people who are 18 or over.  That just doesn't work in an outdoor booth or a private party!
• How do you put it on?
  • I put the paste into little "cones" made from plastic gift wrap, and squeeze the paste out through the tip.  It's just like decorating a cake, only smaller.  Then the paste dries on your skin, and as you leave it there, the henna dye in the paste soaks in.
  • Along with the syringes I mentioned, some artists thin the paste out so that it's more like watercolor, and paint it on the skin with a soft brush!  I haven't tried that yet, though.
• Does it hurt?
  • It shouldn't!  Most people say that it tickles a little bit.  If you have a sensitivity or allergy to one of the ingredients in my paste, that could irritate your skin.  If it does, please tell me, because it means I need to stop.
  • Not every "henna artist" uses natural, safe henna.  Chemical dyes can cause severe damage to your skin. Please see my brochure on "henna safety" for more details, including ways to tell the difference between henna and chemical dyes.
• How dark is it going to get? How long does it last?
  • That depends on a lot of factors; the biggest three are the quality of the henna paste itself, where it is applied, and how long you leave it on your skin.  Other factors include skin chemistry, certain medications, stress levels, even menopause.
  • The dye in the henna paste needs to be able to soak into your skin.  Putting a design on good, thick skin, and leaving the paste for a good long time, will get the darkest and longest-lasting stains.
  • The thickest skin on  your body is on the palms of your hands and soles of your feet.  Second best are the backs of the hands and tops of the feet.  From there, skin generally gets thinner and more delicate as you move inward.  The elderly, young kids, and pregnant bellies have the thinnest skin and will take the least stain.
  • At the extreme, stains can last anywhere between three days and three weeks, but 10-14 days is typical.
• Does it come in other colors?
  • Yes and no.  Being a plant, henna naturally stains in a range from orange-tan through to chocolate or coffee color brown, depending on how fresh it is, where it was harvested, and the quality of the crop itself.  Some people find that henna will stain their skin a bright cherry red that never turns to brown, but this has to do with their skin chemistry.  I currently have an exceptional batch of henna, harvested in 2007, that can stain palms to a very dark "plum skin" color, and a rich brown elsewhere.
  • There are natural dyes such as indigo, turmeric, and wine that are sometimes used to add tints to a henna design (blue, yellow, and rose), but these don't last as long as the henna itself.
  • There is a form of henna art called "gilding" that uses a paste made from hair gel, glue, and cosmetic glitter to draw designs in very bright colors, complete with jewels stuck into the paste as it dries; however, there is no henna or any other dye in gilding pastes, and the color disappears as soon as you remove the paste.
  • REAL HENNA IS NEVER BLACK.
• How long should I leave it on?
  • The longer, the better!
  • The dye in henna paste needs plenty of time to soak into your skin; a good paste can leave a very faint stain in as little as twenty minutes, but it takes as much as 3-6 hours for a really good stain to develop.  Generally, after about 8-12 hours, your skin has absorbed all the dye it can.
  • Some people will even "seal" the paste onto the skin (with hair gel, spray-on bandage, medical tape, or a sugar glaze) to keep it in place, wrap it carefully, and sleep in it overnight.  I usually tell kids to remove the paste before they go to sleep, so that parents don't have to worry about the paste crumbling in bed.
• Can I go swimming/take a shower/sleep in it?
  • If you're talking about the paste, no.  Water will rinse the paste off, or just smear it around and wreck the design.  Sleeping in it is possible with a little preparation.
  • If you're talking about the stain itself, sure!  Scrubbing it too hard might make it wear off more quickly, and swimming can as well, but the stain should still last a few days at least.
• Can you put a design…?
  • On my feet? If you are wearing shoes, I can't put a design on your feet.  I'm thrilled that you are willing to take your shoes off, but you won't be able to put them back on without destroying the design.  The same thing goes for leg designs under long pants, arm designs under long sleeves, and so on.
  • Around my arm? I will cheerfully put a design on the outside of your arm; however, a full arm-band is not practical or comfortable for either of us.  You would need to keep your arm out away from your body the entire time I'm working, the twenty minutes it will take the design to dry afterward, and however long you want to keep it without rubbing it off all over your shirt.
  • Around my ankle? Yes, I can do ankle bracelets; they start at $10 because they require more work than most other designs.
  • Tee-hee, right here? Henna will stain any part of your skin, and I will apply it pretty much anywhere that you feel comfortable baring in front of me.  Keep in mind, though, that most of my business is done either in a public setting or at parties with other guests.  I reserve the right to refuse any request that I decide is inappropriate.

Henna days are here again…

Hello all!  It's been awhile; I hope you're all well and content with life.

The Sagamore West Farmer's Market kicks off this coming Wednesday, May 5, and I will be there and open for business every Wednesday between then and October 27, as long as the weather cooperates.  For this Wednesday only, the first client of the season will get their design for free, up to a $10 value, so come early and remind me why I love the farmer's market so much.  (I don't just go for the cookies, you know.)

The first Mosey Down Main Street of the season will be on Saturday, May 8, and I will be on hand for that as well, beginning roughly 5pm.  "The Mosey" takes place on the second Saturday of each month, with the exception of Labor Day weekend, and I plan to be on hand for all of them.

Over the next few weeks, I will be updating my henna brochures.  There will be a total of four: The first answers those questions I get asked most often when I'm at my booth, and the second provides booking information for private appointments, parties, and so on.  Brochures 3 and 4 are still being written, and will go into detail about caring for your finished henna design and about how to recognize the difference between safe, natural henna and chemical dyes like PPD "black henna".

I more or less dropped off the face of the Internet for a few months, even though I did have a couple of bookings between January and now, so I'll also have some photos forthcoming from those events.  Thanks as always are due to my clients for graciously providing their images to share.

I hope to see you soon!

Best,
Heather

Wow, look at the time...

Holy cow, has it been four months?

I will plead winter depression, busy with henna gigs (plural!), and getting caught up in reading and writing fan fiction.  For some reason, writing is the only thing I do that I actually feel shy about showing off.  Something about it is almost too personal - I can let intimate friends read my work, or total strangers, but I don't want anyone in between (which is nearly everyone) to see it outside of tightly controlled conditions.

Yeah, it's weird, but you already knew that about me.

So, to manage the very briefest of catch up commentary: Embroidery is really happening - in fact I'm down to just the background and then it will be complete and there will be nothing left except the "construction" part of the sewing. I am registered for the farmer's market again this season, which amazingly enough starts in only a few weeks.

And I need to find more work - not just henna, but something with which I can actually pay a few bills.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some comments to moderate (I started getting hit by spammers and had to switch to moderation rather than leaving comments open to all and sundry).

Baby shower! Henna! Pictures!

Okay, that was entirely too much fun.

January 9 was my first baby-shower booking, and if repeated comments are any indication, a great time was had by all.  There were about 12 people there not counting the hostess's family (who took off for a few hours so the ladies could do their thing), and I did henna on every guest except for two, and then threw a couple more samples on hostess's family members when they came back.

Here is an assortment of almost all the designs – no, wait, this is actually an assortment of happy partiers (I won't repeat the introductions from the beginning of the event, where everyone took turns telling how they met the mommy-to-be, but trust me, these are partiers):

  And here is an assortment of henna:

For some of the ladies, the henna was already starting to flake – I blame the weather – but where it has come off you can see that the stain has already begun to develop.

Since we knew the mommy design would be the most time-consuming, and because there were gifts and games and socializing and all that good stuff, we saved her "belly blessing" for last.  The other guests gradually made their way home as the evening grew dark, making for a more intimate and very relaxed gathering:

That's Erin, who is glowing partly because of the baby and partly because of the fireplace she's sitting next to.

If you look very closely, you can see faint pink lines radiating out from the center of the design; those are just lightly sketched on with washable marker, and were the only guides I used to lay out the blessing design.  I had originally thought to start in the center and work my way outward to make a large, intricate mandala or wheel, with repeating images all the way around – something more abstract, in any case – but my intuition kicked in and this was what we got instead:

You can see where the circle I started in the center became a womb/baby instead (whose name is still being kept a secret, which is why it only says "baby" in there with him), and the rest of the image grew up around him.

And here is some blessing symbolism, for the curious:

• Rabbits represent a "speedy" and easy delivery
• The tree is for family, roots, and new growth
• The surrounding circle is filled with "sprouts" for new growth
• Birds at the top, depending on your viewpoint,  can mean being watched over by Spirit, or "bluebirds of happiness" to help protect against postpartum depression
• Finally, I left the circle open at the bottom, partly because I didn't want to ruin the design or Erin's jeans by smearing henna on them once she stood up, and partly because most traditional birth magic includes some kind of symbolic "opening", like unbraiding the woman's hair during labor, for example.  Things need to open in order to have an easy delivery.

We had so much fun, just relaxing and chatting while I worked.  With Erin laying back in her chair, the baby rolled and kicked quite a bit; the funny thing was that you could see the tree branches moving every time he did, so that it looked like there was a breeze blowing.  Talk about bringing a picture to life!

The shower and blessing were a terrific experience for me, and since this one was hopefully the first of many to come, I treasure the memories I have from it.  Best of luck to Erin, and special thanks to our hostess, Courtney, for opening her home to us all.

Cheers!

Henna for the Holidays

We travel to South Carolina once a year to visit my in-laws for the holidays.  There are traditional meals, presents, much yelling (usually the happy kind – there are a lot of kids), and this year, there was henna.

My niece Isla had gotten henna from me before, during summertime visits; I thought it might be nice to offer to work on her, and on my other niece and sisters-in-law who didn't get the opportunity to visit during the rest of the year.

I had FUN.

This took about an hour, I think – I was having such a good time I didn't keep track – and is entirely freehand.  The greener areas are still wet, having been freshly applied only a moment before this photo was taken.  The nearly-black color is where the paste has already dried.  Isla let me finish by taping the design in place with medical tape, which helps keep the paste in place, prevents smudging and flaking, and allows the design to "soak in" for as long as possible.  Considering that the back is relatively thin-skinned, she got very good color as a result.

I have a baby shower coming up in just a couple of weeks, and I can't wait.  If you're visiting my blog thanks to the hostess's email, welcome!  I have a couple of "brochures" available – check my post categories to easily find them – and if you have any questions, feel free to email or call me.

Cheers!